Spying on us U.S.?


So they’re spying … big deal!

ImageLately, that’s all we hear about on the news, how the US is spying on almost everyone on earth, even its closest allies. Well to reassure everyone, the USA just like any other country is also spying on its own people. In other words, they are employing the “equal spying opportunity” and that is something anyone spied on should feel proud of and should take advantage of.

But I am still not happy about that for one main reason. A few days ago I got the flu, and I was shivering in my bed with a high fever. I couldn’t even make it to the kitchen to prepare myself a soup or even get my own medication. Did they check up on me? No. Did they send me any medication? No. Did they at least send me a “get well soon, card”. No, Nothing. I got nothing from anyone. Yet we both know that they know I was sick.

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That same night, my one year old son started crying in the middle of the night, in his own crib. I felt helpless towards him. I wanted to go pick him up, but I couldn’t for two reasons, I was extremely sick, and I didn’t want to spread my virus or whatever I had on to my son; but I expected uncle Sam who spends sleepless nights watching us and over us to at least send in a Nanny to soothe my child back into sleep. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen either.

Now tell me, am I asking for too much here? Isn’t that why they are spying on us? Isn’t it to provide us care when we need it the most?

I am a bit disappointed to be honest with you, but I will keep on giving them another chance since I have no other option. With that being said, I could really use a hand with the laundry. If only someone was listening closely …

 

Raghid Khalil 

 

Exorcism


Exorcism…. A scary subject. It has driven people insane for centuries … or has it ? I am about to give out a couple of scenarios and hopefully you can see where I am going with this.

Scenario 1:
You get up one day and you come to realize that every news channel on earth, not only in your city but all over the world, is reporting the same exact news, “An extremely dangerous and hungry lion has escaped from a zoo, City: Unknown, Country: unknown, Continent: unknown. Take extreme precaution, you have been warned”. At that point, I can imagine every human being on earth freaking out; people might even lock themselves at home until they hear more precise news.

Scenario 2:
Same news being reported on all news channels across the world, but this time, we know that the escapee lion is in North America, within the United States of America, the state of Massachusetts, and the city of Boston to be more precise. At this rate, we will see people panicking, but it will be more contained within the borders of Boston, whereas everyone else across the globe will pursue their everyday normal activity without almost any fear of being devoured by the Lion.

I hope those two scenarios have somewhat paved the way to my following discussion.

drawn by Jeff York, Horror Movie Examiner

We sometimes hear that a person, child or adult, male or female has been possessed. Isn’t it more like my second scenario, whereby now not only do you know the exact city the devil is in, but also the exact body he has decided to limit himself within? Usually when this happens, somehow they tie down the body too.

Now, think of the remaining 6,999,999,999 people on earth. They can go on living their normal life with no fear what-so-ever of Satan. They know where he is? They know he’s tied down? All they have to do is simply keep him there, and one way or another show gratitude to the possessed person by saying “Thank you for taking one for the team”.
From a business perspective, I am not sure why Satan would go about doing the possession thing? Instead of sticking to my first scenario, instilling fear in all 7 billion people, why would he limit himself within one body? And even when he is exorcised out of it, the previously possessed person will also turn against him for misusing his or her body and might even sue him.

Something to think about…

P.S: Needless to say, this article is not based on research, it is intended purely for humor.

— Raghid Khalil